Marathoning Can Save the Amercian Economy

Running a marathon is different that your average daily run in many ways, all of which I'm sure I'll be complaining about at various times in the next 4 months. One such difference is the amount of financial commitment it takes. For starters, the average race entry fee is 3 to 4 times higher than that of your neighborhood race. I guess it must be to pay for all that extra Gatorade on the race course. The good thing is that with that kind of money on the line, there's no way I'm backing out. I'm in this now.

Training for, and running, a marathon requires a wardrobe of accoutrements that most women will probably never put on their shopping lists. So for the sake of education, here's the breakdown of items I've acquired on my quest to run 26.2 miles.

Running shoes. We're talking serious running shoes, not, unfortunately the trendy new "it" style of shoe that you want to wear to look cute. No, these are strictly utilitarian. First you must discern if you are a pronator or supinator, which are fancy ways of saying "what part of the foot takes the brunt on your footfalls?" and then purchase shoes accordingly. It can pretty much assumed that said shoes will have be mostly gray. Yawn...

Moisture wicking clothing. Through the magic of modern technology, we now have these wonderful articles of clothing that weigh next to nothing and dry super fast. No longer do we have to wear those cotton t-shirts that grow in length over each sweaty mile. Thankfully, these do come in colors other than gray. However for some ridiculous reason, they make them in white. No woman with sweat glands should ever buy a moisture-wicking shirt in white. Seriously.

Sports bra. Not just any sports bra will do. Any woman with breasts that don't need training must have a "high impact" sports bra. Now, we do have choices. There are compression styles which basically just mash you so hard that your breasts start to come out of your back. Then there's the encapsulation styles that are reminicent of Madonna's cone bra ensemble from the early 90s.

Shopping for these gems of the fashion world can be an interesting experience. This year I needed a new bra and starting looking at various stores. Apparently Bloomington-Normal only has small breasted runners so I had to move on to Peoria. Luckily I found a store that carried a selection of sports bras that were actually bra-sized instead of small, medium & large (yeah, right!). My mom was with me and was helping me find some styles to try on. As she looked through the racks (heh, heh - racks!) she held up one that listed it as being my size. My comment to her was "These are not fitting in there!" And you know what? They didn't. Luckily, other manufacturers were more generous with the amount of fabric used.

Gu. This is where things start getting interesting. Gu, for the running novices, is a pudding-like edible substance, available in a variety of flavors, that contains a lot of nutrients endurance athletes need to replace during long workouts. They come in little packets that you tear open and slide down your throat with water while without missing a step. Unfortunately for me, the last time I trained for marathon, I threw up after every Gu "meal." For obvious reasons, I will be replacing the Gu with Cliff Bars, Cliff Shots or some other nutritional wonder that boasts some adventure athlete on the package.

Fuel belt. These nifty elastic devices hold your race numbers and, much like a plumber's belt, provide spaces to hang a variety of other necessities, including the aforementioned Gu. During the 4 or 5 hours that I will be running through the Disney parks I will likely have uses for a variety of items like a Cliff Bar, my inhaler, an iPod, and possibly a small recliner. The added bonus of these fuel belts is that you look like a "real" athlete.

Body Glide. I know this sounds kinky, but it's actually very practical. This wonder product, which comes in a container that looks like a deodorant stick, has saved many a woman's thigh. Distance runners apply this to areas prone to chafing - the inner thighs, bra bands, where the sleeve ends, etc. If you're interested in buying some Body Glide for yourself, be sure to purchase it at a reputable sporting goods store. I can't assure you that there aren't other products sold at, umm, other stores that also go by the name Body Glide. Caveot Emptor.

Nip Guards. Ok - these are for men, but they are so intriguing to the folks I've mentioned them to that I thought they merited inclusion. I've seen many men finish long races with 2 blood stains where their nipples used to be. Why? Because they didn't use Nip Guards! Yes - they are what the name implies. They guard the nipples. Now years ago, the smart guys used Band-Aides but those are cotton t-shirts in a moisture-wicking age.

So that's my list for now. I'm sure it will grow in the coming months. I don't want to tally how much money these items represent. Let's just say if President Obama could get more Americans to run marathons, this recession would be so over!